Journal 7 - Brooke

https://www.poetryfoundation.org/
http://www.poetryoutloud.org/

He is Trying to Get Home From the Store,

By Susan Firer

but lake winds pick him up

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& blow him into the clouds. I
married a dreamer. I wait. He
stops to listen to the early
lilac orchestra. He starts to
change into blowy horizontal lake
rain, then migrating red admirals.

I thinksay remember. I remember us.
We chose the imaginal
north/south somewhere
between Bartlett Avenue and Jupiter,
between Lake Michigan and
the Aegean. Remember we drink
 Serbian Cosmos together, we eat
squash blossoms and red snapper soup.
We visit the Calatrava before bed. We
nurture a magnetic field of words. I am

remembering you back. Remembering
plays time. Thinking is all remembering.
I remember our young
bodies. I'm not finished
with us. Remember that.
If someone asks, "why is that lady
out walking in that lake storm?" Tell them
"months ago her husband went to the
store in a blizzard& never came back."
Tell them: "She can't stop looking for him."

I  liked this poem a lot because it was so sad sounding and nostalgic, and it also made the lady sound kind of insane. It was like an inner-monologue from a crazy person. It was sad, crazy, and sweet all at the same time.

Poetry foundation is by far my favorite website. It's such a staple for a poet. I found a ton of information on Emily Dickinson when I did that presentation. Everything is so neat and nicely laid out. Poetry out loud was much the same. Everything on that website was very neat and easy to find. I didn't like the MPT website as much, I felt like I had to dig around a lot more. I did like that MPT had the SoundCloud link of the reading of the poem right there next to the poem. I thought that was really cool. Overall I would give poetry foundation a 5, poetry out loud a 4, and MPT a 3.

Journal 7: Morgan DeWitt

The two websites that I really enjoyed exploring are:

www.poetryoutloud.org

www.poetryfoundation.org

I loved the poetry out loud website because I now have a new understand for how impressive it is that these young people can recite poems this well from memory (especially after taking three times to recite mine- haha!).

Just watch this- it's so impressive: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=l5aArwwfAKg

The favorite poem I found while browsing the web was: Writ on the Steps of Puerto Rican Harlem

by Gregory Corso-

There’s a truth limits man 

A truth prevents his going any farther   

The world is changing 

The world knows it’s changing 

Heavy is the sorrow of the day 

The old have the look of doom 

The young mistake their fate in that look   

That is truth 

But it isn’t all truth 

Life has meaning 

And I do not know the meaning   

Even when I felt it were meaningless 

I hoped and prayed and sought a meaning 

It wasn’t all frolic poesy 

There were dues to pay   

Summoning Death and God   

I’d a wild dare to tackle Them 

Death proved meaningless without Life 

Yes the world is changing   

But Death remains the same   

It takes man away from Life   

The only meaning he knows   

And usually it is a sad business   

This Death 

I’d an innocence I’d a seriousness 

I’d a humor save me from amateur philosophy 

I am able to contradict my beliefs   

I am able able 

Because I want to know the meaning of everything 

Yet sit I like a brokenness   

Moaning: Oh what responsibility   

I put on thee Gregory 

Death and God 

Hard hard it’s hard 

I learned life were no dream 

I learned truth deceived 

Man is not God   

Life is a century   

Death an instant

I had never heard it before and it blows my mind that someone memorized this! Crazy!

The poetry foundation is just a great website where you can find literally any poem you want. They also offer some history and analysis for some poems. I find myself always using this site when looking for a poem.

I give both websites a 5 star rating. The Poetry Out Loud source is awesome if you want to watch some talent and jog your creativity. Poetry foundation is great if you are looking for a specific poem.

I HAD A GREAT TIME IN THIS POETRY CLASS AND I'M GOING TO MISS YOU ALL!!! HAVE A WONDERFUL AND SAFE SUMMER :) 

LOVE, 

Morgan DeWitt 

Aziz Hamid Journal 6

Part One:

The piece that caught my attention the most in the Wax Paper was To Be Great, Be A Whale by Holly Wren Spaulding. 

The poem is short and easy to read. The poem is one big stanza which I think works well in this poem.  

The poem was motivational to me.  After reading this poem, I got a boost of confidence. This poem strengthens my determination to pursue my goals.  This poem hit me emotionally. The first line “Be a blue whale with a heart the size of a room” sets the tone well for the rest of the poem.

The message of the poem is to strive for greatness. This message of the poem is universal. Everyone has their own set of goals and challenges.

My favorite line is “Let few see you. Let them wonder.”  To me this line basically means to work hard in silence. Nowadays most people like to brag about their accomplishments and success. Some people post their accomplishments on Instagram, Facebook and other social media. They want everyone to know what they accomplished and this line is basically saying to stay humble.   

Another thing I noticed in the poem is there are many commands in the poem.  For example, “Be more at home”, “Let few see you”, “Take note of what is right and true about the world there." This goes well with poem because the poem is encouraging the readers to be great. Having commands helps the reader feel more empowered.

Part Two:

I believe my criticism improved the most through our workshops. At first, I had a really hard time providing criticism to my classmates on their poems. I didn't know what to say or talk about. The more workshops we did in class the more I improved on my criticism. For example, when criticizing a poem I learned to talk about how the line is used, prose vs friction. I improve on identifying devives and techniques the writers use such as alliteration,enjambment, refrain, figurative language and more much more. 

Journal Six: Amanda Gifford

Part One:

The piece in the wax paper that really caught my attention was " Drought Season". The diction throughout the piece sparks interest such as purled and vapor. The imagery of the vapor becoming rain is pleasing and is an ordinary process that is crucial for the farmers. The separation of the stanzas of past and present weather patterns is also interesting. It alludes to different tones as the first stanza seemed hopeful in the rain as it felt never ending providing a nice growing season. The  second stanza focuses on the hardships of a drought and believing that miracles can happen. It feels full circle in that the weather changes frequently as does life and the challenges presented with it.

Part Two:

Throughout the workshops I feel both my writing and criticism has improved. In the beginning critiquing a poem felt intimidating and I focused more on devices and the stanzas. As they progressed my viewpoint changed and it was nice seeing the different styles people presented. To view what others enjoyed such as rhyme or experimenting with the lines and alternating stanza lengths. That many different tones and voices can exist without leading to a downfall. That my attention is now drawn to the overall analysis of the poem and its theme being conveyed. My writing has felt consistent with focusing on imagery and being quite long in line length. The workshops helped with bringing attention to the devices used in my poems sometimes being unknown uses of alliteration. That hearing what others can relate to within it helps with trying to make the poem universal and not just mine.     

Journal six by Britnee

Part one: The poem that caught my eye is Apocalypse. I really liked the short lines and the shortness of the poem in general. The stanzas and lines look like they were chosen at random; some having only one word lines or one line stanzas. The first stanza is my favorite. It has a nice sound and introduces the idea of the poem straight away "this is how I want the curtain to close:" I also liked how there is no capitalization other than the I in the poem.
Part two:
I think i have improved most in my criticism because of the workshops. I have also improved my writing but i am now able to pick up on more things in others writings that i still trouble with in my own writing. When reading other peoples poems, I notice words that just do not fit very well or doesn't make sense in the context. I also look a lot for if there is a rhyme or not. If there, is does it stay throughout the whole poem. In Dathans last poem he workshopped, Bark and Tooth, He had a rhyme at the beginning and soon dropped it.  I think my improvement of my criticism has helped my writing as well though. The things i look for in other peoples poems I think about when writing my own poems.

Journal Six from Dathan

Part One:
The piece that I enjoyed the most from this paper was The Second to Last Supper. It is about an inmate that is waiting to be executed.

1) The first thing that I noticed about it was the fact that until you got around the end it doesn't actually say that he is a prisoner waiting to die, the man who is getting for for him is a guard and it doesn't mention a prison at all. Even though it becomes obvious well before then end what is happening, I still think it was cool how he evaded what was really happening.

2) Another thing that I like about this one was the ending. Once you know that it is centered on prisons and knowing that the title is The Second to Last Supper it is not too far of a leap to guess how it is supposed to end. Prisoners on death row can order whatever they want, within reason, if anything is missing that is within reason from their list their execution gets pushed back. The prisoner just ordered a lot of food, nothing too hard to find, practically anything that you could find at a fast food place. Their was one item that the guard in charge of getting the food could not find, and tried to avoid the subject, hoping that the prisoner would not notice; it was orange juice. The best part about the item being orange juice is that the state they are in is Florida. So, in the end his execution gets postponed, and he gets another meal.

3) In one of my other classes we went to Marion Correctional Institution. We met some of the inmates their, I didn't think it would be anarchy or stabbings but it was still different than what I expected; they are just people, real people. This story is a little ridiculous, but I could see someone doing it. I mean by telling the guards that they forgot something you push back you execution and get another meal.

Part Two:
I'm honestly not too sure which has improved more. I fell that some of my newer poems are worse than some of the earlier ones. I will go with my criticism. It is kind of like the poems, every once in a while I give a helpful criticism, but most of the time it is really nothing too unique or put together. The hard part is going to be after this class, when we have to critique our own work and then fix them. When we were getting ready for our poet presentation Aziz and I looked at each others poems that were do that day, it was the one after spring break. We both did something related to the ear. I would have liked to hear some of those poems of his in the workshop more. Variety.

Rosen Journal #6

Part One:

The piece that stuck out to me the most in the wax newspaper was Contact by Robbie Gamble.

1) The first reason that this piece stuck out to me is because of the shortness of the poem. I love reading short poems because ironically they usually have the most to say. In this short poem it describes a story of a speaker meeting a man that had been shot in seven locations on his body. The speaker then describes the locations he was shot, laundry list style, and then finishes on the piece by saying he "rubbed his forehead for luck" which can be taken in a passionate sense or a literal sense. For me, it can go either way and I love the mystery of not knowing whether this speaker is a cynic or a gentle and caring person.

2) The second thing that I noticed in this piece was the tone of the piece. The entire piece had almost a comedic or ironic tone. This is portrayed with language like "bitch slap", this line made me laugh (realistically smirk) and stuck out to me while reading it. This poem really was funny and carefree and I loved the aura around it. Gamble takes such a serious condition of a man getting shot seven times and makes it much lighter when it could easily be dark. This tone drives the poem fully and makes it the poem that it is.

3) The third thing that I noticed while reading this poem is the set up of the poem. The stanzas are uneven with the amount of lines used per stanza and also the length of each foot. This kind of adds to the tone of the poem with how it's almost a "no rules" type of poem and I really like that. This poem doesn't need rhyme scheme, this poem doesn't need pentameter, this poem needed to say what Robbie wants the speaker to say and thats all that matters.

Part Two:

I believe that I've improved the most when it comes to criticism. When it comes to writing I take the comments from the workshop seriously so that I can add to my poems but overall I believe that I'm usually more of an independent writer and while I've improved in my writing in this class I think that my criticism has show more of a prominent improvement. I think that I've definitely gotten better at listening because I'm such a talkative person. I will be honest, because I'm a talkative person there are times that I will talk just because I know it is helping me with my grade for participation. But as the class went on and we did more and more workshops I learned to really hear people and listen to what they're saying before just spitting something out just to say it. I think an example of this is when we were going over Dathan's piece "Disparity" (I think thats what it was called). In this workshop I didn't talk much and I really listened to what everyone was saying and also watching Dathan to see how he was reacting to see what he thought of the responses just through body language. Once people said what they had to, it gave me a better idea of what to say, and I'm happy to be improving on that section of criticism. Now when it comes to actually critiquing other pieces I think I've gotten better at being honest with people's work whether it's brutal or not. I think that telling people that bad parts of the poem can be even more important then telling them the good parts because if they don't hear the bad then they won't improve. I think that towards the beginning of the year I would say more positive than negative because I truly didn't know how to analyze a poem the way that I do now. I didn't know what enjambment was and I didn't notice the symmetry in poems, and now that I do I have the ability to point it out when it looks good and bad. I think the best part of learning how to criticize other peoples pieces is that now I can criticize my own pieces, be honest with myself for when I'm writing something poorly, and in the end that's what's going to make me a better writer.